Mom Guilt & Gratitude
I just had a moment of deep gratitude. Just now. The kind of gratitude that brings you to your knees and choke back tears. This week, my former colleagues are all gathered for an annual conference that will inspire THOUSANDS to be better leaders and fight for the hearts of the next generation. I love seeing their posts..... it brings so much joy to my heart that they do what they do. This organization was truly like family to me for 7 years. And the conference never disappointed. We all left completely wrung out and yet filled up and inspired to make a difference. But one of my deepest regrets as a parent was that I missed Charlie's last wrestling tournament -- Districts. Where he became the division champion for his JV weight class. Because I was working....at this conference. Instead of crying mama tears as they placed that medal around his neck, I got a photo texted to me. I didn't know it at the time it would be the last time he would ever wrestle. And let me tell you, watching him wrestle was like watching a game of masterful chess. It was incredible. Instead of future tournaments, we would spend future years fighting for his heart and happiness. Tomorrow, I will be cheering my 🍑off for my son at the water polo state tournament. And it hits me like a ton of bricks right here with worship music playing in my house: I would be at the conference right now -- working -- if I had never started this coaching thing on the side. And it's not that working the conference is a bad thing - it was one of the highlights of my year.... but having the FREEDOM to cheer for my son and cherish the moment IN PERSON is BY FAR BETTER.